Oh Joy

Ryan is home for Christmas and it is so bittersweet. I love him so much but dont really like him at times. Hes like a ring leader at the house. If he doesnt like something I say he will tell me and then all of a sudden I have all 3 kids on me about whatever he doesnt like. Its a bit overwhelming. I found myself trying to stay quiet for the past few days to stay outta the line of fire. Its a weird place. Im not the cool parent like my older sister and I get to hear it all the time..not sure if and when it will change but I havent changed, they have. I am the parent, not the friend. I will tell you not to drink and drive. I will not let my 19 yr old drink in my home. I will not let my 16 yr old have a boyfriend. I will correct you if you say the F word 3 times in more than 30 seconds in front of the baby. I will get upset when you sleep with the next door neighbor and her 18 yr old son gets upset with you. I will get upset if you fight in my parking lot and disrupt my neighbors. This may be ur vacation, but this is my home. I was called a hater, judgemental, grouchy, and many other things..but never was there a thank you for the tons of dishes, favorite meals, never ending houdourves, laundry and the list goes on. I did not go to my sisters this year and you would have thought I commited murder. I dont know why I always have to do the compromising. never her. She smokes in the house and I should deal with it. Well guess what, I am. Im not going anymore. period. I have come to the conclusion I am just different than my family, like it or not. I know I am not the easest person to get along with but I am so happy its over. I picked the boys up and took them to Yucca. Ryan has spent a total of 3 nights at my house in 3 weeks and he leaves Sunday. I will go back to Yucca to pick him up to take him to the airport. My cool sister would never go outta her way to do any of the driving. But thats ok..Love my kids, just dont like them at times.